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Chapter 3.9. Sitting Between Two Persons
If you enter a room do not sit between two persons. Instead, sit on their left or right side. Abu Dawood reported that the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: 'No one is to sit between two people without their permission.'
Sometimes two persons will be kind enough to favour you by making room for you to sit between them. Acknowledge this kind gesture by accepting their offer. Do not sit crossed-legged to crowd them out. A sage said: 'Two persons are considered immoderate: a person to whom you give advice and he arrogantly holds it in contempt against you, and a person who is favoured with a seat in a room and he sits crossed-legged.'
If you are seated between two people, do not eavesdrop and listen to what they say, lest their conversation be a confidential or private matter. Eavesdropping is a bad habit and a sin. Al-Bukhari reported that the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: 'Whoever listens to people's conversation against their wishes, will be punished by liquid lead being poured down their ears on the day of Judgment.'
You should seek to benefit from the company and wisdom of the elders who are described as ' a fruit at the end of the season.' I would add, 'a sun wearing the veil' since it will leave us and disappear at night. Be keen to attend the gatherings of the elders whether scholars, pious persons, nobles, or relatives. Soon you may lament their departure and your loss.
It is an inappropriate Muslim manner to whisper to someone sitting next to you if you are in a group of three people. The third person will feel deserted and isolated and will think the worst of thoughts. The Messenger (PBUH) hated this. Imam Malik and Abu Dawood reported that he said: 'No two shall exchange whispers in the presence of a third person.' That the Prophet used 'No two...' in an assertive negative form, indicates that such a mistake is not only inappropriate but an unimaginable and instinctively despicable. ‘Abdullah Bin Omar was asked, 'What if they were four?' 'Then it does not matter,' he answered, meaning it is not irritating then to whisper or to mutter. If a friend entrusted you with a secret, do not betray him or her. Do not tell it even to your best friend or closest relative.
Chapters
Chapter 1
Importance Of Appearance
Chapter 1.1
Distinct Muslim Personality
Chapter 1.2
Cleanliness And Washing
Chapter 1.3
Arriving From A Journey
Chapter 1.4
Dress Properly With Family And Friends
Chapter 2
Entering Or Leaving A House
Chapter 2.1
How-to-enter
Chapter 2.2
Entering While Others Are Asleep
Chapter 2.3
Greeting
Chapter 2.4
Announcing Your Presence
Chapter 2.5
Seeking Permission To Enter
Chapter 2.6
Knocking And Ringing
Chapter 2.7
Answering 'Who Is It?'
Chapter 3
The Manners Of Visiting
Chapter 3.1
Keeping Appointments, Delays And Cancellation
Chapter 3.2
Declining A Visit
Chapter 3.3
Control Your Eyes
Chapter 3.4
Removing Your Shoes
Chapter 3.5
Choosing A Seat
Chapter 3.6
A Visitor Is Not An Inspector
Chapter 3.7
Timing Your Visit
Chapter 3.8
Greeting
Chapter 3.9
Sitting Between Two Persons
Chapter 3.10
The Host's Duties And The Guests' Rights
Chapter 3.11
Stay In Touch
Chapter 3.12
A Brief Advice To My Sisters
Chapter 4
The Manners Of Conversation
Chapter 4.1
Selecting Suitable Topics
Chapter 4.2
Talk In A Suitable Tone
Chapter 4.3
The Art Of Listening
Chapter 4.4
Discussions And Debates
Chapter 4.5
Swearing By Allah
Chapter 4.6
Answering A Question
Chapter 5
Social Manners
Chapter 5.1
Respect And Favour The Elderly
Chapter 5.2
The Elderly Are To Lead Prayers
Chapter 5.3
Walking With The Elderly
Chapter 5.4
The Elderly Are To Be Served First
Chapter 5.5
Manners With Parents
Chapter 5.6
Tell Your Family Your Whereabouts
Chapter 5.7
Respect The Poor
Chapter 5.8
Dealing With Non-muslims
Chapter 6
Manners Of Eating
Chapter 6.1
The Importance Of Eating Manners
Chapter 6.2
Manners Of Eating
Chapter 6.3
Manners Of Drinking
Chapter 6.4
Avoid Gluttony
Chapter 6.5
Gold And Silver Cutlery
Chapter 7
Weddings
Chapter 7.1
Weddings Are Part Of The Prophet's Tradition
Chapter 7.2
The Manners Of Attending Weddings
Chapter 8
Visiting The Sick
Chapter 8.1
Visiting A Patient
Chapter 8.2
Praying For The Sick
Chapter 8.3
The Length Of The Visit
Chapter 8.4
The Manners Of Visiting A Patient
Chapter 8.5
How The Ill Express Their Complaints
Chapter 9
Condolence
Chapter 9.1
Breaking Unpleasant News
Chapter 9.2
Expressing Condolences Is A Courtesy And A Duty
Chapter 9.3
Expressing Condolences And Sympathy
Chapter 9.4
Sending Flowers And Reading Quran During Funerals
Chapter 9.5
A Final Word